If you're a person who has recently experienced a loss, you might feel awkward when comforting someone else. Grief and loss are confusing emotions and many people don't know what to say or do. While it can be tempting to avoid social contact and not reach out to the grieving person, it's important to keep trying. They are reaching out to you because they care. In addition, you can do the same. If you're uncomfortable comforting someone who is grieving, there are several helpful tips to consider.
Complicated grief
Complexified grief is a natural response to loss and is characterized by intense feelings of pain and loss. Also known as complicated bereavement disorder, this condition may be experienced by those who have lost a loved one or are experiencing grief for other reasons. The intensity of this grief can be so intense that it disrupts daily life. It is diagnosed after the first six months after the loss, and may last longer if a person has a social, cultural, or religious connection to the deceased person. The condition is a medical condition and has no official sanction or fast diagnostic scheme.
Complexified grief and loss can also affect reintegration into daily life, relationships, and work. The individual may avoid social situations or isolate themselves. Additionally, complicated grief may affect the individual's physical health. Research suggests that individuals with this type of grief are more likely to suffer from high blood pressure, headaches, and decreased quality of life. Fortunately, there are a number of effective treatments for complicated grief and loss.
Suicidal thoughts
Suicidal thoughts after grief and loss are common for people who have experienced the death of a loved one. Anger and frustration often accompany the pain, and are not uncommon. Anger at other people, those who let the loved one down, or even at oneself may lead to suicidal thoughts. To prevent suicide, it is important to understand the warning signs and seek support. Below are five common warning signs of suicidal thoughts after grief and loss.
The first symptom of suicidal ideation is feeling desperation, often accompanied by guilt and anger. Often, people are angry with themselves for not doing enough or not seeing enough signs of suicide, or angry at the person who committed the act. Many people experience suicidal thoughts, and question their relationship with the deceased. They replay the final act of the deceased in their mind, second-guessing their actions and wondering what might have been done differently.
Adaptive behaviors
While it is natural to feel a variety of emotions during grief and loss, some of these reactions can hinder the process. Negative adaptive behaviors include imagining alternate scenarios, protesting death, and self-blame. Other undesirable responses include losing faith in oneself and the world, or excessive avoidance of reminders of the deceased. Here are some ways to manage these feelings. These behaviors can be helpful when your grief and loss are not recurrent.
Many people find it difficult to cope with their loss, so they turn to self-destructive behaviors to escape their sadness. Adaptive dependency may protect an individual from a prolonged period of grief, as it helps them recruit assistance and support from others. In contrast, adaptive detachment may result in a person's inability to cope with the loss of a loved one, so future studies should investigate mechanisms that promote this form of self-destructive behavior.
The grief curve
Studies have shown that the brain changes associated with grief and loss can influence both physical and mental health. For instance, words related to loss caused increased activity in the amygdala, an ancient region of the brain strongly associated with fear and negative emotions. The brain regions associated with rumination also showed increased activity similar to those seen in clinical depression. Researchers are currently studying the effects of the grief curve on these changes in brain activity.
The data in this study show that disbelief about the death of the loved one peaks at the earliest post-mortem time. Yearning for the deceased increases until about four months after the loss. By six months, anger becomes fully expressed. In contrast, acceptance gradually increases through the study observation period of 12 to 24 months. These findings support the stage theory of grief, but suggest that the curve is not completely linear.
Treatment options
While there are many different types of therapy available for people dealing with grief and loss, most bereaved individuals are resilient and can heal on their own. With the support of friends and family, clergy, and clinicians, the healing process usually takes place on its own. There are also several group therapy options available. Group therapy is usually much more intensive than individual counseling. Group therapy focuses on sharing experiences and feelings with other people who are dealing with similar loss and grief.
Although grief and loss are universal, there is no universal way to process a loss. Most people successfully adjust to the loss and move on with their lives. However, there are some individuals who need additional treatment to cope. Treatment options for grief and loss vary from person to person, and many may be best suited for one particular type of person. Some individuals experience intense grief that can be characterized by persistent distress and impairment in function. For such people, intervention may be needed for weeks or even months.